Category: Grief

Affording a Funeral for an Infant

For the purposes of this post, “baby” or “infant” shall refer to a child aged one year or under, and a fetus at any stage of development. I am seeing a lot of GoFundMe pages set up for families seeking financial help after they lose a baby. Nothing is wrong with this, as there may…


Losing a Daughter, Gaining a Son…Not in the Way You Think

I am a funeral director and embalmer with eleven years in the business, but many don’t know I am also the mother of a transgendered child. I have always been supportive of the LGBT community and I knew the right thing to do was accept my child’s new gender identity. She [I still use the…


In An Instant

While you were complaining about bills; yelling at your kids; wondering where the good tablecloth was; playing video games; cleaning the fish tank; calling your mother or learning a second language, I was picking up the pieces of a multiple-family car wreck. One man’s life is forever ruined; his wife and daughter are dead and,…


It’s the “Live Without The One You Loved The Most” challenge!

I don’t know what the first “challenge” was, but I imagine it had something to do with conquering a physical feat. Weight loss, or a strength goal; perhaps finding the courage to enter a race or other athletic event. Then they started getting dumb. I remember a “challenge” involving swallowing a large spoonful of cinnamon;…


The Body We Didn’t Want Them To Find

I’ve been reading many news stories lately about funeral homes in trouble with the law for mishandling human remains – hiding them on the property rather than keeping them in refrigeration, usually because the families cannot afford to pay for the cremation or other arrangements. In my opinion, disrespect of a human body and refusal…


I’ll Pray For You

Here’s a better idea: DO SOMETHING! Here are suggestions of things that will help a dying person or the recently bereaved. 40 Things More Useful Than Prayer 1. Give a cancer patient a ride to chemo 2. Clean the house of someone who is hospitalized, or buy them a month of maid service 3. Cook…


Remembering Harley

The one who was there through The Bad Years. I think I’ll eat one of his favorite grilled cheese sandwiches tonight. (Slideshow below) This was our favorite band. There’s things inside that scream and shout.


Worse Than The Screams

The silence.


You’re Normal

I woke up crying three times in a row this morning. For someone who hasn’t cried in several years, this is unusual. I’m still not sure if I was crying only in the dream. It was the same dream, the recurring one where he’s not dead and no one understands how he miraculously survived the…


Cancel The Burial

Calling off a scheduled burial is no easy task. Everything scheduled in addition to the burial – church, minister, flowers – has to be called off as well, and the vital records office has to reissue a new death certificate with the corrected burial date. So if you want to cancel a burial, you need…